Category Archives: Animals

Gentleman’s Club

(Post from Jan 28, 2015 – that i just found in my drafts. Somehow escaped my sight, so here it is)

Location: Tarapoto, Amazon Basin, Northern Peru.

Life after the jungle has been surprising. The rules are as follows. No spices, no citric, no fats, no coffee, no carbs, no meat, no tomatoes, no onions, no drugs, no sex, no weed. For at least 30 days.

When i got out of the retreat, i came straight to Colores, the same place i had spent 10 days the last time i was in Tarapoto. This time around, there were 3 men when i checked back in (with Juan Carlos). So it’s now officially a gentleman’s club. That’s an awesome strategy to keep all horny thoughts away, for a straight guy at least. We occupy hammocks in boxers all day and have farting contests. The one that makes everybody run for fresh air wins. Fernando is the current unbeaten champion. Dora the dog comes in a close second, but she doesn’t win any prizes cos she’s female. At other times, we play poker. I suck at it though.

We watch movies, from my collection of 10 flicks that i carry everywhere, on J-C’s big screen. I’ve even downloaded spanish subtitles so they can all understand, and i can learn spanish too. Sometimes J-C takes the tv into his room to skype. I bet skype sex is better on a 50 inch screen. But i sure hope he’s not cheating on the diet. He’s broken up and patched up with his girl 4 times in the last three weeks.

He, and every other fucker here has a bad habit of putting used matchsticks back in the matchbox, and if i berate them they just laugh and tell me to fuck off. ‘Hahahahah fuck off you indian guy’. So i spend my time reading Palahniuk, watching TV shows (just finished Homeland S04), my fave movies on repeat with Spanish subtitles, listening to amazonian music, playing the guitar, playing with Dora, and removing used matchsticks from matchboxes. Not the most exciting life i’ve led, but definitely the most peaceful and contented. Sex, drugs & rock n roll can take a vacation.

Last week, on 22nd Jan, we opened an Indian veg resto ‘Bambu’ as part of Colores. The place was mostly done up by Miro, the one-man-army from Halifax, Canada who came here to start a new-earth project in the jungle. For cycling down the Nevada desert naked in the early 90s, he deserves his own post on this blog. Our chef is Margie, who lives 10 blocks away. She spent 12 years in India, Poona to be specific, and she makes amazing chole-bhatura. My job was helping Fernando and Gabriel (from the Canary Islands) to paint the logos and signs outside, and playing bollywood music on opening night. Dished out my favourite tunes growing up, from Amitabh Bachchan movies to Aamir Khan flicks, to R D Burman and Kishor and even some Rahman thrown in for eclectic feels and all that. Bollywood night in an Indian veg restaurant in Peru. How we never cease to surprise ourselves…

The next day we were in the papers. There’s a pic of me hiding behind the laptop screen. I’m going to make a youtube playlist for Margie to play every night. Maybe i’ll share it with you.

This week i’m in San Roque de Cumbaza, where the town is gearing up for the carnaval, the biggest festival all over south america. Every nook and corner is going to be a massive party. And i’m headlining act on Sunday night. AND, i’m going to be playing sober. But there’s no other way than to nail it inside out. I’m living at this gorgeous place over the hills called San Roque Centro de Artes, where artists from all over the world come down to do a residency, teach kids, art instalments, etc. It’s run by Daniel, who was with me in Cumbaza for the ceremonies, and his wife. Daniel has literally shown me the light a couple of times in the last month, especially since i’m blind at night . There’s a gorgeous cat here, that Daniel brought with him from Cumbaza, and Arco, the white lab. I’ll be here till Monday. Then another 10 days at Colores, and back on the road post that. Can’t wait to climb some snow-capped mountains, or hit up an oasis, or just go surfing again.


Kerala – God’s Own Country

I don’t like to post disturbing images. But this absolute lawlessness in ‘God’s own country’ has gone way beyond even God’s comprehension.

40 dogs were killed 2 days ago in Kannur. This has been happening on a daily/weekly basis for a long time now. Apparently these harmless little creatures are seen as ‘dangerous to society’ by the most literate state in the country. Makes me shudder to think what the rest of our great country is capable of.

Some of the images posted on this page make my heart wrench. https://www.facebook.com/pages/Kerala-Dog-Culling-Worldwide-Protest-BoycottKerala-Movement/863563613712030

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Show me a more dangerous creature than man. There are pups in that picture that don’t look more than a month old. And this is just one pic from over the last one year of this absolute massacre. I can’t go through most pics myself. How cold our species has become.

In this last episode, two women who tried to intervene were apparently manhandled by the contract goons, in the presence of police. Our great land. If you can read Malayalam, this below is a letter from the State Public Information Officer & Health Supervisor – Kannur, to my dad, who intervened in the killings around July of last year. This letter reassured that no further killings would take place, but exactly a year down, nothing seems to have changed.

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I pray this ends soon, before the state has no dogs left. When you realize you’ve disturbed the balance of nature, it’s too late.

The mass mentality in Kerala is so pathetic towards dogs, that such atrocities are just ignored by the junta. The ignorance needs to be treated, the fear needs to be addressed. I mean, how many dogs have harmed humans, as compared to humans themselves. Can we go about injecting cyanide into humans on a mass scale and dumping them into holes in the ground? I would love that.

Adopt pets. Introduce your children to them. It’s engraved in stone, a child growing up with these four legged souls grow up to be much, much better human beings. If one has to learn unconditional love, it is from them. Even your moms and pops and kids may disown you some day. Dogs will never.

Help in any way you can. Ask for answers. Boycott Kerala till this bullshit ends. Make a noise. That houseboat ride through ‘nammade keralam’ and it’s backwaters can wait. God’s watching your priorities.

Sorry if you thought this was going to be a post about Kerala tourism. #BoycottKerala